Something is Weighing on Me so I’ll Give Things That Hold Weight to Lessen the Load. Logical AF.

No-Blues Tuesday #1

March 14th 2017

Today was my first day being late to my new job. I slept in and ran out the door without my staple lunchtime PB & J – boy, did that set me back. I had a rocky start to my day but I did my best not to let things get me down. While I’m on breaks or doing something fairly independent at work I listen to music that lifts my spirits. I jam, on the reg, and dance out in public, alone and don’t care if anyone see me. If anything, they should feel a little jealous of my fun and dynamite moves.

*For the record: I’m a solidly average dancer, at the moment*

One of my daily actions today is to add another resolution to my list. So, let’s talk about all of them. I had 6, initially. In January I felt the need to add another and I set a goal, when creating my Game Plan, to select and implement another this week. On Sunday, I decided it would be today.

My new resolution was, unintentionally, suggested by – we’ll call him – my “amateur adviser.” He’s an exceptional critical thinker and has been aiding in my transition from being stagnant to, rather, inviting my nature to become a torrent of growth and incite. While out practicing driving(I’m not licensed, yet) he brought up that I should give a portion of my income to a charity I’d like to support. An organization popped straight into my head, even. After we had gotten home I asked him what prompted the idea. He explained that, with this great new job, I should think about how I want to return the good favor I’d been shown by the universe. Also, that it would attract more of the same. You know, “what goes around comes back around.” That sort of thing.

The easy to chew version of my resolution list goes like this:

1. Gratefulness – I want to glow with gratitude.

2. Positivity over Negativity – Negativity keeps my head underwater and starves me whereas positivity feeds me and encourages me to keep swimming.

3. Accountability – I want to be just as accountable for my pain and suffering, when I am creating it, as I am  my happiness and success.

4. Motivation – My reasons will come and go, bend and break but I want it to be my responsibility to always have them.

5. Creativity – I feel like I am an artist and I know that, in itself, can be a beautiful thing. So, I’ve made a promise to myself not to ignore my need for expression.

6. Service – I will practice giving to others and not expecting anything in return.

7. Express Love – I will no longer assume that people know, to what degree, I care about them. I will make an effort to make it apparent.

That catches us  up. Today, I have decided to add:

8. Charity – I will, starting with my first paycheck of the year, be giving a portion of my personal finances to an organization that is close to my heart and conducting research that I support, tremendously. I will show charity outside the realm of finance, as well.

By committing to resolutions for once in my life, I’m building momentum. I’m moving forwards faster and that’s pretty significant considering I used to be scared to move, at all.

It’s been six months since I decided to dedicate my attention to healing and personal development. The more I force myself to embody a positive attitude the less tolerance I have for negative cycles of thought or moods. I don’t miss being content in my misery. I don’t miss having hindsight as my only teacher. She was a real b*tch who threw punches and screamed every lesson to be taught.

I think I overuse and misuse metaphors.

To do is to learn, sometimes.

Well, there’s the slice of me I felt like sharing tonight. I’ll be back tomorrow with some more of my pollen and the stories behind gathering it.

*with all my honey*



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